5. July 2019 Text by Diana, Photo: AdobeStock
“Know thyself, and you will know the whole universe!”
inscription on the frontispiece of the temple of Delphi
I am pretty sure I have told you already, I exercise meditating every day or, better saying, every night. I don’t have a rule for meditating. Usually, I choose how I meditate depending on the feelings of the moment. Sometimes it goes traditionally, by concentrating the attention on breathing and trying to consider the thoughts like birds flying on the sky of the mind, so let them come, observe and let them go. Other times I like focusing on the sensations or on specific areas of the body, such as hands, belly, head. Sometimes it comes to visualisations or inner journeys.
Well, in one recent evening I did some kind of visualisation. I let the thoughts simple flow through the valley of the mind. In the beginning, the thoughts were like words or ideas, but they quickly became imagines. And as imagines, they’ve turned into revelations, each one small, but coalesced, grew into something powerful. Seeing and feeling this, I wanted to mark these images, to impregnate them in my memory and later to put them on paper, like I am doing right now. Amazingly, I have not been able to see these thoughts the way they first appeared in my mind, that is, each one in its time frame, but they came to me all of a sudden, that is, stapled one on another. It was very bizarre, I clearly saw everyone though in his uniqueness. It was like, a staple of written papers, to which I could see not only what was written on the first sheet of the staple, but what was written on all of them on the same time.
Happiness and misery are facets of the same feeling.
The various degrees of happiness or misery create the reality around us.
The measure of happiness or misery is given by how you react to what happens to you or around you. In general, your mind emanates thoughts or reacts to situations, making us happy or unhappy.
I found out that the source and the creator of my happiness is nobody else than me. I personally have the key to transforming happiness into misery, and vice-versa, it would be better to be careful of how I use it.
Nor my child, nor my husband or even my family are bringing me happiness. Only the relationship that I build with them could. The happiness that flows from me is infinite, while the one my beloved ones are giving to me is always insufficient. Why? Because no one ever will be 100% the way you want him /her to be, and generally the missing percentage are always the cause of the unhappiness and suffering.
The only person that can be 100 % as you wish is …, yes, you guessed it! It is yourself! Be a pleasant, joyful and entertaining person to yourself!
Of course, my happiness can be overshadowed by the unhappiness of those around me. What I can do about this? I can do everything it is in my power to make them happy. But … you know, happiness is a personal choice. It is impossible to make happy someone who finds its pleasure in sufferance and misery. And just as it is with happiness, inside us is also an infinite source of sufferance. Like I’ve said, the choice lies by you!
It is important to know the outer-reality, but crucial is to know, to feel, to live and to shape the inner-reality because the outer-reality is only a reflection of the inner reality.
I have always believed that reading, learning, and acquiring information gives you knowledge. By nature, I am a curious being, I do not let anything to escape my curiosity. I’ve read a wide range of books. From novels to science and spirituality books. I went to conferences, courses, seminars and I’ve studied. But all this has not brought me wisdom but only knowledge and … confusion and frustration. I’ve realised I actually know … nothing. I know the form, but I’ve missed the content, it has remained occulted to me. However, all I have done so far has brought me to this point where I’ve realised that only inner exploration brings wisdom, gnosis.
Furthermore, I’ve realised that all mistakes I’ve done or were done to me by others, and for which I have been maybe outraged or resentful for a while, have made me that who I am today. Now I am finding myself in front of a door, a door that takes me beyond, in every sense. I’ve always aspired to get here, and without these moments of the past, I would certainly not have been here now. I would also not have had the key in my hand, with which I could open this door. When will I open the door? It doesn’t matter. I know already what’s beyond.
I needed all these things in my life; trials, obsessions, dissatisfactions, failures, struggle with myself, weaknesses and doubts. All this have led me to this revelation; I am the source, the source of my life, the source of happiness and misery.
And at last but not least, I want to say something on a subject that’s quite taboo among many people: the death – as a passage. Very few people are aware or think about that once we come in this world, we are already destined to perish. In essence, it doesn’t matter when you are born or when you will die. What matters is what you have done between these two limits of life. And this could mean: build your life so that you would not regret any moment of it.
It means; be RESPONSIBLE for your life!
“Chains of steel
Munich 2009
are constraining my being
conceived in a moment
of forgetfulness …
I want to break free!”